On making myself feel good

I was wondering recently how exactly did I come up with the three points related to my inner game priorities. Especially the first one, about making myself feel good.

Now I remember, it's taken from Dimitri (The Approach) who has great stuff on natural game.

I've taken the following excerpt from Psyneh's blog :

This time its a post written by Dimitri which focus on feeling good.. enjoy!

Now more than ever, I can point my finger to exactly one part of the Western society woman, and tell you what she is looking for:

To feel good.

It's it. That simple. The vast majority of women in the West want to feel good, and will evaluate most decisions in those terms. Any perceived attempts by a man, or another woman, to make her feel bad will cause resentment. She will think the person is less valuable, and relate to him less (bad for value, and attainability - two parts of what create attraction).

In fact, the most attractive men are men that seem to want to feel good, and make others around them feel good. If you're part of the "feel good" club, you will seem more valuable, and women will understand where you're coming from. This is where the basis for one night stands, short term flings, the "thing on the side", and so on come from. Women now turn to marriage with a stable guy when that would make the most sense in terms of feeling good - once social pressure begins to build up that she should be married, once she's grown bored in her career, when she feels children will make her feel good. And even then - she's likely to take a man on the side from time to time. Numbers on how many women have extra-marital affairs are murky and deluded, but regardless of what scale you're using - they're pretty damn high.

Now at this point, many men reading this might be starting to get resentful of women. And any women reading this might become indignant. This is from a lack of communication.

The fact is - the pursuit of good emotions is no more right, wrong, true, untrue, just, unjust, noble or petty than anything else in the world. Life is what you make of it and what you want to make of it, and if you desire is feel good things, then that is fine. In fact, it's a fairly straightforward goal, and not a bad focusing point until you develop other causes in your life you might want to champion (for women, this is often their children as they get older - men usually take on other causes).


If you want to have women in your life, my friend, you need to seem like a "feel good" thing, and in fact, anything you do that portrays you like to feel good and want others to feel good will increase both your value (for obvious reasons) and your attainability (because women can relate to it).

TEN RULES OF FEELING GOOD:

1. Make yourself feel good first.
2. Never try to make anyone feel bad.
3. Try to make everyone around you feel good.
4. Making other people around you feel good makes YOU feel good - even making others feel good is a semi-selfish gesture.
5. You never sacrifice your own good feelings to make another person feel good.
6. You don't feel negative emotions, except when doing so makes you feel good.
7. You don't try to fix problems - you try to make people feel better about them.
8. If it's not your job, don't try to go logical, or linear about issues around. It's not fun.
9. Never look down on anything - be indifferent about stuff that you don't like.
10. If you're failing to keep one of those rules, that's okay as long as you keep the appearance that you're following them.

The ideal kind of fun comes from a leader who engages in "mutual value escalation" - this is where someone makes someone else feel good, and themself feel good at the same time. Why do women love gay guys so much? They follow the feel-good plan, and mutually value escalate a lot.

"OH - MY - GOD! You're SO Pretty!"

You might also note that that almost all of the cultures of the world that are thought to be the most sexual/desired engage in these behaviors - They often greet each other with big hugs, lots of kisses, compliments, and great hosting/entertaining of each other. They play games, dance, and drink together. They want everyone to feel good.

It's simply unacceptable to put someone down unless they're trying to ruin someone's fun. Anyone that's increasing the fun and good emotions around is to celebrated with. Your M.O. for dealing with fun people needs to be joining into the fun - or more accurately, bringing them into your fun. If they're unable to join in having fun with you, THEN you may dismiss them - remember, it's wrong to disdain someone. We simply ignore those who aren't fun, or occasionally have a little fun at their expense.

It's impossible for someone to have fun at your expense if you're someone that follows the culture of having fun. If someone makes fun of you, you laugh, smile, embrace them, joke about it, or make a good retort. But your goal in doing so is to have fun and good emotions, and to make them and everyone else around have fun too. If you want to deal with guys who don't have your best intentions at heart, simply try to have mass amounts of fun with them. They'll either have fun with you and come to have your best intentions at heart (they're now your friends) or they'll miss a step, stop having fun, get offended, et cetra - and they're then cooked.