The banter post

I'll use this post tp put all te banter stuff I can fun/invent.

This is an excerpt taken from the PU101 blog.

November 26, 2006
Make Banter Work for You Every Time
Our instructors are constantly posting solid-gold advice on our VIP Coaching Lounge. If you're not a member already, you are missing out on a chance to get real-time coaching from the best in the business.
Just to show you what you are missing, today we're going to share another amazing insight from pickup coach extraordinaire Sean Deacon (visit his blog at blog.seandeacon.com), who follows up on his rules for SMS game with the guide to get you having fun, and succeeding, with Banter. Enjoy!
I realized something about banter during the last Art of Attraction Workshop. It came together after hearing something that Lance said when he was introducing the idea of banter to the group. He said (and I paraphrase) that banter is essentially role-playing. The banter line just establishes a role for the two of you that you can then act out in a playful way. If you look at banter in this way, it lends itself to banter INTERACTIONS, rather than the use of banter LINES.
For example, when you call a girl a brat, you are using a banter line. If you assume the role that she is a bratty little sister and you are the cool older brother, then you can go on to say something like,
"you are gonna totally get sent to your room for acting up. And you have to DENY it when all your friends call you up and tell you they think I am cute, OK? I don’t want to be kept up all night hearing your giggles, ok?"
The "classic" banter lines are great, but they are just that, one-liners. You can say "I don't know who your boyfriend is, but he is not spanking you enough", but where do you go from there? What if you assume that you are now a love doctor, and she is a love patient in need of treatment? That sounds pretty fun to me.
Sometimes I will find something in the situation, or something a girl says, and then I will assume a role for her. I then assume a role for myself in relation to that role, and act out those roles.
At the last Art of Attraction Workshop, I ran into a girl that I had met a few weeks earlier. We had been emailing since then, joking about switching jobs, because she had a bad week at work. When I saw her, I told her I had a new job if she still wanted to switch, that I was a go-go dancer. The role set up was now "we are go-go dancers". I asked her what kind of cage she liked to dance in. I told her I got new knee high boots with fur around the top and she better have something cooler than that if she ever wants to be a better go-go dancer than me.
I think most people can see how banter interactions are better than banter lines. If you deliver a banter line, you are just some guy with a funny line. If you can start role-playing, you can have a much more fun and playful interaction.
Some of you may have seen Sean Newman go on after a line like "I am just here to flirt with you". He can keep going and going off of that idea. What he has done here is set up the role that he is an expert flirting teacher, and the girl is a cute student who needs to learn how to flirt. He riffs and riffs off of those assumed roles, and the result is a funny and charming interaction.
I see the PickUp 101 coaches do this all the time. They throw out a line, and keep riffing off of it. What makes it easy to riff off of this is the assumed role-play BEHIND the banter line. Consciously or not, they are playing a certain role, and treating the girl like she has some complementary role, and going from there.
Here's another personal example I have used:
"You are so cute. I just want to take you home with me. You know what we are gonna do? We are gonna make forts out of the couches with the pillows and blankets, and we are gonna play house, and we are gonna watch cartoons, and then mom is gonna bring us some ovaltine, and we're gonna crawl inside our fort to drink our hot ovaltine, and then we're gonna watch cartoons all morning."
The role here is that we are cute little kids together, that we are gonna have a bunch of innocent childish fun together (ever play doctor when you are a kid?).
I have used these examples when flirting with girls. The usual result is giant smiles and laughter.
What I hope that some of you guys will get out of this is how to take banter LINES, and turn them into banter INTERACTIONS.
You can take an existing banter line, assume some roles between the two of you, and then deliver it from that perspective. If you open some girls and spit out,
"I really like it here, I am so well lit!"
That can be funny, but where do you go? Assume the role that she is an artist, and you are the art!
"My god, I should be a sculpture! Are you good at art? Listen, if my cute adorable smile is going to be captured for eternity as a statue, I need a VERY GOOD artist to get it just right. I need that creative flare that I know is hiding behind that big smile you have on your face."
After that, smile, tickle, then drop into some deep rapport, find something unique and special about her that isn't obvious, and fall just a touch in love.
Sean "jaz" Deacon~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~http://blog.seandeacon.com

Lay Report: The ex's best friend

Yo, I had sex for the second time with a close friend of my ex.

Before I talk about the second time, let's go back and see how it all happened.

A year after my ex and I split up (a couple of months ago), I started thinking that I should make a move on the Friend of the Ex (let's call her FridEx). I felt that she had been attracted to me for a while, even during my relationship, so it was up to me to make things happen.

It's really cool to realise that I have at least assimilated some simple concepts related to relationships with women. In this case, some important points to keep in mind in order to get the lay:

-First and foremost, it is the man that LEADS. I have to make things happen. The way it works, things don't just happen by themselves, the man seizes opportunities and makes it seem like 'it just happened'

-Second important point: Being discreet. In general, women are very fearful for their reputation. Particularly in this case because FridEx, my ex and I are part of the same extended social circle. That means that FridEx is worried about people in general finding out, and the ex in particular because they are really great friends.


Steps to get laid:

First of all, seizing the opportunity. FridEx sent a group email about watching a DVD at her place. I saw that almost no one responded, so I sent an email where I enthusiastically stated how I had always wanted to watch said DVD (no really). A few days later I called her to see what was up with the plan, she said that nobody so far had confirmed. I told her I'd come and will be bringing wine, and that I'll call some people to get them moving.

I brought the wine alright, but conveniently forgot to call anyone of course :-).

At her place, I was totally relaxed and fun, teasing and making jokes, but not flirting. We watched the DVD, and eventually her roommate went to bed. As soon as we were alone, we started talking, and I began the 'accidental' kino (waving my forearm to make a point, and the forearm touching her knees for ex).

I realised we had a seating problem because we were on a big couch and I needed her to get closer. So I proposed that we watch some cool videos online. That's because there was only one chair in front of the desk. I went to sit, she came, I moved and gestured her to sit next to me. I started showing her some of the videos, explaining what they were about. Then I escalated by caressing her hair above her ear. She became quiet, and then said something along the lines of "I can't believe I'm doing this".

For the rest of the night, her ramblings where of three types: "I can't believe I'm doing this" "She's my best friend, I could never forgive myself if she found out." "Promise me you won't tell anyone".

I managed this as best I could, telling her this is our thing (creating a frame where we have our little secret), pretending to back off, and then taking her and kissing her passionately. We ended up in bed, making out like mad (she was horny as hell!) and then she would stop, look at me and tell me "Promise me, promise me, promise me !!", which I obliged, trying hard not to grin or laugh.

So the sex happened. She was so horny she came from penetration soon after.

Afterwards, and the next few days, I kept in touch with her, soothing her, telling her not to worry, that we made a pact never to tell anyone, making her feel special, etc...

All in all, a good experience.

Fast forward to two days ago. I had told her before that I was traveling soon and that it would be good if we could get in touch. She called soon after and mentioned that it 'would be good if we hung out before you travel'. The second degree meanings were loud and clear.

The night of the lay, I called her, asked her what she was up to. She said nothing much, felt like relaxing at home. She "happened" to mention that her roommate was sleeping at her boyfriend's place tonight (the roommate knows the ex, and thus cannot find out about us.).

I saw the opportunity and seized it by asking her if she'd seen a certain movie. She said no. I told her it was a hilarious one, that I had it on cd, and then asked if she had a laptop. She answered yes. (me: "oh that's cool! Hey, I have an idea, let's watch it at your place" lol).

I got to her place, the laptop couldn't play the cd, so we watched tv, then turned it off and started talking about politics, then I touched her hair above her ear...

Then we fucked.

No LMR, no emotional management later on. I got to come on her breasts too. (I came on her hair a bit as well, but don't tell her :-) )

That's it, nice and easy does the trick.

Keys to the lay:

-Seizing opportunities.
-Making things happen, take the lead.
-Deal with logistics.

Cheers,
F.